The Instagram dilemma.

March 26, 2021

Isn't it funny that we give so much of our time and mind space away to an app. I have had many instagrams over the years but I would of had a "main" insta for almost 10 years now. It's gone through many phases and I've deleted everything on it a few times in the aim of creating a ~curated feed~, whatever that even means.

In the past, I have had a weight loss instagram, 2 nail and beauty instagrams, an art instagram as well as my main instagram and probably others that I cant even remember. It's strange. Like why do I feel the need to break up my personality into these little squares and to make them more digestible for an audience. In summer last year, I deleted a nail instagram and an art one in the thinking of "no, why should dissect myself into these categories. All of these things add up to make me" which is true. I enjoy art and exploring creative outlets. I worked in the beauty industry for years and love everything nail design. I do want to try better myself. All of these add up to one person. Me. 

I think part of it stems from the fact that my instagram went along side my old blog. I've had a blog in some form since 2010, the same year instagram launched. The two just went hand in hand, one promoted the other and vice versa. When I stopped using my old blog (late 2017, early 2018) my instagram didn't really change. I still took the same style of photos and I always have enjoyed photography and editing. That didn't change just because I didn't blog it anymore. What is different though, is trying to stop thinking that the followers you have are there as readers/viewers. When I meet someone new and they say "what's your instagram?" part of me kind of doesn't want to give it out because it's not your usual selfies or pics of day to day life. I used to dread when someone from real life would follow me because my blog was mine, my secret, mine to share only if I wanted to. I even stopped posting as often and barely using stories a few years ago because I had more "real people" follow me. Then I decided, fuck it. Life is too short to care. 

However, more and more I find myself wanting to start separate instagrams again. I think it’s more in a bid to find likeminded people, a community to learn from, engage with and grow with. I don’t really know what the purpose of this post is to be honest, there is no right or wrong answer. Different things work for different people. I guess I need to find out which works for me.

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